Rob Rouse's Comedy Village

creating Comedy. Scroll down for free examples! 18+

83 members
549 posts

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Recommended

A TENT £1, (OR £2, £3, £4, Or Whatever!)

$1.50

/ month

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NOTE: THE TIERS ARE JUST A GUIDE, YOU CAN ENTER & PAY WHATEVER YOU WANT AT CHECKOUT :)
FULL ACCESS TO:
MONTHLY COMEDY SPECIAL, REGULAR PODCASTS, SKETCHES, VIDEOS, ARCHIVE AND BEHIND THE SCENES & MORE BUT NO EXTRA GOODIES.
Thank you for your one whole pound. But when did you last pay £1 for a comedy ticket? Of course I'm trying to guilt you into paying more. If you opt for this tier you can see all the content in the village and come to all the shows, but in your metaphorical tent you'll get an awful nights sleep, the blazing sun comes up at 4.30AM, as a splitting headache kicks in from all the red wine you hammered in the hope it'd get some rest. You've only got yourself to blame. You deserve better, come to the more opulent tiers...

Full library access

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CARAVAN, WITHOUT ELECTRIC HOOK UP

/ month

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FULL ACCESS & CREDIT ON A VIDEO!
Like the those under canvas, for a measly £5 per month you get full access to all the treats the village has to offer. You'll feel a tiny bit smugger as your name flies past on the screen. Also you won't have to use the toilet block in the middle of the night, but let’s be honest you’re still taking a dump into a tiny plastic toilet no more than 3 feet away from your children's sweet and dreaming faces. The only thing separating them from this airborne toxic horror story is a Rizla thin wood-effect cardboard door. Full transparency, the caravan in the picture is our family caravan, where we spend all our holidays, so please give generously or go up a tier.

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Recommended

A SINGLE ROOM AT THE B&B

$13.50

/ month

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FULL ACCESS + SHOUTOUT ON A PODCAST!
Now you're starting to live a little. You're quite well rested, but the owner of the B&B Ralph, kept you up too late telling you about why his wife left him whilst crying into his whisky. However, you are the kind of villager that doesn’t smell of chemical toilets. You are the kind of villager I would wave to across the street when I was coming out of the Bakers shop. You can walk through the village with a swagger in your step and know that you look good. Thanks £10 villagers, you deserve your buffet breakfast. Next time stay at the Hotel :)

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Recommended

HOTEL

$26.50

/ month

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FULL ACCESS + A DAFT SONG WITH YOUR NAME IN IT!
You guys really know how to have fun. You get everything that the other smelly campsite dwellers and the B&B folk get but you guys are special. I sing about you guys! I would definitely come and have a chat in the hotel bar with you for between 5 and 10 minutes, or come over and flatter you in front of someone you were trying to impress, like a Parish councillor or someone else important. If you go up one more tier, you could move in proper!

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Recommended

YOU ARE ON THE PROPERTY LADDER!

$39.50

/ month

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FULL ACCESS + PRIORITY TICKETS LIKE A FRICKIN CELEB OR A BESPOKE VIDEO BIRTHDAY MESSAGE!
So you have officially moved in and become a part of the fabric of the village itself. For £30 per month you really are a highly respected member of the community. You'll get priority booking on tickets and events. And can guff on in the pub about "How great it is to be on the property ladder" & "It's basically a do-er-upper" and all that stuff. I will probably try to follow you around the village a little bit, constantly saying thanks, but you wouldn't need to fear for you safety. Congratulations on your new home and welcome to the village.

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Recommended

LOOK AT YOU IN YOUR FANCY BUNGALOW!

$52.50

/ month

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FULL ACCESS + A DEDICATED CHICKEN RACE!
You're classy. You always have been and always will be. That's why I'll name a chicken race after you. It's an honour you deserve. You cut the crusts off sandwiches and serve them on a doily. Your dinner parties always involve the very best of the village. (Parish councillors, PTA members, The man who runs the scouts who smells of Sugar Puffs) Perhaps we should have an Anne Summers Tupperware party or something, or just talk about how important we all are? Sound like a plan? By the way the Wisteria is looking fantastic and YES you should buy that new car.

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Recommended

IMPOSING DETACHED FARMHOUSE

$65.50

/ month

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FULL ACCESS + A SURPRISE IN THE POST (NOT A POO IN A BOX)
If you have got this far then I very much doubt you are paying your taxes. This is a considerable wedge of money, hence my handwritten thank you letter. I'm pretty sure no one will even get to the point of reading this one, so I can pretty much say whatever I want. If anyone gave me this much I would do all of the other stuff but I would probably dream about them, I would say a prayer of thanks to them before I ate my kippers and make a strange effigy of them for the children to bow to every time they entered the house. You guys really are the best people in the village, but shush don’t tell the others I said so, apart from the campers you can say what you want to them. They stink. I mean they REALLY smell.

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Recommended

SWEARY BILIOUS LANDOWNER

$130.50

/ month

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FULL ACCESS + A CHARACTER IN A SKETCH NAMED AFTER YOU!
You essentially own me if you have gone this far. Now I don’t know whether to be grateful or worried. What could I even offer for this? If you sponsored me for a whole year at this level I would make an effigy or bust of you out of clay and drive it to your house. It could get awkward but I will cope. I have boundaries, but I'm prepared to see how flexible they are for enough cash.

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Recommended

VILLAGE ROYALTY

$651

/ month

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FULL ACCESS - ALL THE EXTRAS AND I'LL COME AND UNBLOCK YOUR BOG IF IT GETS BLOCKED!
Now I am not a doctor but there is a chance that if you are spending £500 per month on this then you could well be in the middle of some sort of ‘manic phase.’ I will wait for the cheque to clear, I'm not an idiot, and then pass on your details to the village doctor. If it turns out that you are just an incredibly over generous millionaire then great. Will you be my best friend? I will send you postcards when I go to Rhyll if you like?

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