When is a Third Place a winner?

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Where do we go to relax, to be free to say what we want to?

Where could we all go to, to gather, to feel ‘at home’, to allow relationships to flourish amidst a diversity of people, to enable community to be sensed and grow, to encourage sociability rather than isolation?

We could start at home, our home. It may be a place of like-minded souls, so possibly not particularly diverse. Moreover, the ‘community’ may be limited in number; furthermore, today, homes are where isolation may begin. Then there’s our workplace. Some employers have designed our workspaces so that we can engage, communicate easily, be together – albeit that is to promote increased productivity.

I recall working in areas where the desks where separated with dividers, like in a school language lab. This, to me, made me become far more focussed upon using alternative means to communicate, such as on the phone or email, to people at the adjacent desk.

Where’s next? The Third Place.

Third Place,
taken with thanks from here

Oldenburg is Frost’s inspirational book ‘Exiles‘ (alternative book sellers exist) suggests that the ‘third place’ is the bedrock of community life, naming that this could be the knitting or running group, or be situated at the coffee shop. Historically we have always had social clubs, forums, the pub, where we can chat together. Think of the coffee bar in Friends, for example. These places could be: inexpensive, easily accessible, where we feel welcome and make new friends: otherwise we may be creating conditions for exclusivity.

What could you describe as your ‘third place’? Do others frequent it as well?

Central Perk

Some ‘third places’ offer free wireless access, comfy chairs and reflective music or musak. It’s here that we can let our guard down, where people can speak more openly.

Where might Jesus have hung out today? In the Gospels he was found eating with friends and so-called ‘sinners’, he didn’t keep himself to himself. He wanted to be where the people were, to chat over food, to hear what they have to say, and to offer his wisdom.

This might suggest that the Church needs to shutdown its current set of ‘pointy’ spired buildings and invest heavily in a line of coffee shops. Rather than that, let’s utilise what is contextually valid where we live. For one, we are supporting the local economy and two, we are far more integrated with society – being incarnational, to use a word in vogue at Christmas.

To continue the theme of coffee though, if I may, our current church settings are fairly solid, set, formed; whereas, if we were to allow our communities to grow through conversations in different settings then we may need to accept the more dynamic changeable possibilities. Here, we could allow: what was structured to become flexible, reacting to the needs of the community; what was measured by attendance to be discerned by the spiritual understanding; and where the imperative of membership might be seen as exclusive is now found refocussed as mission. Pete Ward, in his book Liquid Church, contrasts these concept as ‘Solid Church versus Liquid Church’.

In this post-Christendom world, where the previous focus upon the Church as societies mainstay has disappeared, requires that we re-imagine what ‘church’ may be like. Rather than bound by the walls of the building, we are seen as a community, people. One such community, from Australia, uses some simple rules to enhance social cohesion without setting exclusive boundaries. They use the acronym BELLS.
Bless one another, give an affirmatory word of encouragement each day.
Eat with others regularly. This enables greater opportunities to share and understand differing opinions.
Listen. They desire to intentionally listen to God’s call upon their lives but also to hear the voices which may not be heard every day.
Learn. That is to understand, contextually, what Scripture is saying to us individually, but also to see where it impacts on and in our daily lives.
Sent. This is to understand our calling to bring hope to others. Luke 4:18 ‘ to proclaim the good news to the poor’*.

The concept of meeting in ‘third places’, of using basic models of living to enable community, looks simple but could be so easily adapted, in our context, to help small communities to grow. What are your thoughts?

* not necessarily poor in financial terms, the verse in the Beatitudes ‘Blessed are the poor’ continues to add ‘in spirit’.

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